Monday, October 29, 2001

Fasting to Come

One of my most wonderful co-workers wants to fast with me. I'm exploring health oriented fasts of a couple of days. I think we'll be doing one next week.

One of my former co-workers is planning to fast for Ramadan. I have thought that I will fast in the style of Ramadan for the first day or so and the last couple of days of Ramadan. (I haven't, yet, tried to figure out if this is some kind of horrible blasphemy.) I think bc and I are both thinking that to join the fasting period in some way will help to bring us closer our friends, neighbors and enemies who are Muslim.

posted by Drew @ 10:47 PM | link to this post

Economic Stimulus

Here's the House's idea of an economic stimulus package, part of our war effort:

$1.4 billion for IBM
$833 million for General Motors
$671 million for General Electric
$572 million for Chevron Texaco
$254 million for Enron

posted by Drew @ 10:28 PM | link to this post

Going to War

If we are going to go to war against terror, it seems to me that we should send our warriors into Afghanistan to fight the "evil doers" and allow the warring parties to kill each other. We say that we are ready for war and that we must go and engage in killing in response to September 11th, yet we are equivocating about putting troops into harm's way. I think we do this because the people who believe in war also believe that the majority of Americans (and Brits and Germans) won't support the "killing is the only option" response when the thousands of young American men start returning home in body bags. If this "war on terror" is to be fought, then we need to go and fight it and we need to let American soldiers be killed on the battlefields and spare the lives of children and women and other non-combatants in the area. If we aren't willing to pay the price of thousands of our young "warriors" being killed to accomplish the ends, then we should pursue another path. (Please note, I advocate we pursue another path.) The thought (make that reality) that we continue to bomb children and red cross warehouses and non-combatants in order to make the war on terror more palatable to westerners disturbs me to no end. We are endeavoring to make war acceptable by making the killing and death that is necessarily the essence of war remote, even absent from our experience of the war. In the process we are killing children and women and because they aren't "us" we don't care or at least we are willing to accept it.

Obviously, I believe that faced with the deaths of our sons and daughters in order to accomplish the aims of the "war on terrorism," we would choose a gentler, more responsible, more loving path.

posted by Drew @ 10:14 PM | link to this post

Sunday, October 28, 2001

Our War on Terror

posted by Drew @ 4:14 PM | link to this post

Quote of the Moment

As I rode the bus to Alameda this morning, I was reading Second Sight by Judith Orloff. The bus ride ended and I stopped reading after reading the first couple of sentences of a paragraph. As I sat back down and relaxed in the restaurant, I picked up the book and began to read again and re-read the first two lines of the paragraph again. I read on down to the bottom of the page and was interrupted by a young boy at the table across from me as he slid his chair across the restaurant (about ten feet) right in front of my table and stood on his chair and looked at me. I acknowledged him and smiled. As I rose to help him safely get down from his perch and return to his mother and father, his mother came and spoke gently to him and to me. I resumed reading and my eyes went back to the beginning of the paragraph I was now reading for the third time. Twice more in the restaurant I was distracted from my reading before finishing the page and each time my eyes returned to the beginning of that paragraph. I laughed and stopped reading and began enjoying the happenings of the restaurant. When I returned to the bus stop to wait for the bus (51M) back to Berkeley, I relaxed on the bench and opened the book and began to read:

"In this receptive state, I was primed to reexperience the intuitive side of myself. To do that, I had two weeks of dream groups, meditation, introduction to the use of healing rituals, energy work (the laying on of hands), and two days of silence and fasting."

posted by Drew @ 1:07 PM | link to this post

Feeling Relieved and Rested

I feel good this morning. I trekked off to Alameda for breakfast and a stroll along the water's edge.

posted by Drew @ 12:50 PM | link to this post

Saturday, October 27, 2001

Sitting
I started the day early, about 5:00 AM. As I sat, I could barely calm my mind. As I followed my breathing, I kept coming back to thoughts about my conversation last evening with FK. I had a very enlightening conversation with someone who caught my attention a couple of weeks ago. Our conversation and getting to know each other over the phone included making plans to get together this week for dinner. Hence my brief entry yesterday evening shortly after our conversation concluded. I liked everything I learned about her last night and felt greater strength from her than I had expected. Back to this morning. Pleasant thoughts and a feeling of excitement stayed with me throughout my sitting. After about 30 minutes, I relaxed and played part of a dharma talk on tape by Thich Nhat Hanh. Near the end of the tape it suddenly went silent. I was unsure if the tape had ended or had somehow failed. I was unsure of my awareness of the tape and rewound it and replayed the final moments of the talk.

(Dis)Connecting
Later in the morning, I turned on my computer and received what I perceived to be a hateful e-mail from the person at work with whom I'd had problems earlier in the week. It was startling for me how quickly and deeply my mood turned. I almost instantly turned to thinking obsessively about her words and questioning myself and my conduct with her and how I had expressed myself in my e-mail to her on Wednesday. I could find no trace of the happiness I'd felt just a few moments before. Throughout the day, I struggled with my energy to engage the world today. I had planned to head out to the nearby farmers' market bright and early. Instead, I barely made it out there at all. It took every bit of will power I had to get me out the door. Once out, I ran into my neighbor Nancy, who was returning from the market, and chatted a bit. As I entered Center Street, I stopped and spoke with Bennie and gave him a dollar for a Street Spirit I didn't take. At the market, I tasted apples and pears and plums and filled my canvas bag with vegetables and fruit, but was nervous and fumbling as I interacted with the vendors. I returned home to be sick to my stomach for a few minutes. I decided not to go to Golden Gate Park for a bluegrass festival. I decided not to call a friend that I knew would be there because I just didn't want to have the interaction. I started closing the blinds and the windows of my apartment in an effort to be alone. I resisted and made myself go out. I walked down Shattuck to north Berkeley and stopped in at the Cheeseboard. I picked out a scone. When I arrived at the register I couldn't remember what kind it was. I fumbled with identifying it to the cashier. He spent some time (what felt like years) apparently trying to unscramble my communication. I grew angry. "They all cost the same amount! It's a dollar fifty." And suddenly inside I was that hateful, hate-filled, angry, little boy that I was growing up.

What's Going On?
My day went downhill from there. I stayed inside with the blinds closed and I didn't try anymore to interact with the world. I was certain of my unworthiness and my failing as a human. I began deconstructing events and restructuring my thoughts as though my life depended upon it. I could see my self-doubts and crushing emotions rooted in my physical and emotional brutalization by my father. As I began to connect the events and the emotions of my present and past, I felt a brief moment of comfort in my ability to "make sense of it." Then the fury returned with new vigor and new thoughts to sustain and stoke and direct it. "How can I still be so fucked up by a dead man!" "How can I not have moved on from things that ended over half my lifetime ago!" And, of course, the answer is "because he was right."

This Evening
The "healing incense" is burning. I am trying to find my compassion and direct it towards myself, towards the man on the floor on his zafu doing recitations and breathing and breathing white light up and down his body as he sits. I am not dying. I am looking at how to get myself prepared for Monday morning. I have therapy at 8AM, followed by a job interview at 10AM and likely some consulting work in the early afternoon. And I will get there.

posted by Drew @ 10:35 PM | link to this post

Friday, October 26, 2001

Smiling Buddha, Giddy Buddha

posted by Drew @ 11:54 PM | link to this post

Those Eyes

I've got this thing for eyes. I'm not precisely sure why, but someone's eyes can have a huge initial impact on me. I suppose they're part of my penchant for pretty faces. I've crossed paths with a couple of pairs of eyes that reached in and grabbed my heart in the last day or two. Yesterday, I made reference to my needing to wear reading glasses when I put together network cabling. This morning my eyes are in full spazz mode and don't want to let me read without reading glasses. A few months ago, my eyes started giving me some trouble. I picked up a pair of reading glasses at a drug store, but then thought better of it and picked up my book on The Bates Method for Better Eyesight Without Glasses. I did a few of the eye exercises for a few days and my eyes returned to something approximating normal. I've been parked in front of a computer monitor at work for the last couple of weeks and my eyes are not letting me read the liner notes from "I do not want what I haven't got." without putting on the reading glasses. Fortunately, the book is in rather large type so I won't have to face the issue of using reading glasses to read a book that eschews the wearing of reading glasses.

posted by Drew @ 9:41 AM | link to this post

Quote of the Moment

everyone can see what's going on
they laugh 'cos they know they're untouchable
not because what I said was wrong
whatever it may bring
I will have my own policies
I will sleep with a clear conscience
I will sleep in peace
Maybe it sounds mean
but I really don't think so
you asked for the truth and I told you
through their own words
they will be exposed
they've got a severe case of
the emperor's new clothes

Sinead O'Connor

posted by Drew @ 9:24 AM | link to this post

Wednesday, October 24, 2001

I can't decide whether to drag myself out to the Castro for Halloween.

posted by Drew @ 11:43 PM | link to this post

For Those of You Who Think I'm Nice, You Should Meet Her

I spoke with my mother this evening and learned that the Florida Times-Union had run this little feature on her today. Talk about the original anti-terrorist. If only I could convince her to make the sandwiches vegan!

posted by Drew @ 11:07 PM | link to this post

Got Job?

I've got an interview Monday morning with the City of Berkeley. It's got me thinking a good bit about what I want. The more I think through that option, the more likely it seems that that job can't really offer me what I want. We'll see.

posted by Drew @ 10:59 PM | link to this post

Media Whore?...Nope, Just A Whore

I headed off to San Francisco this morning on BART after writing the post below. When I arrived at Powell Street and exited the paid area this cute guy approached me. So, I stopped hoping he was gonna ask me out or kiss me or something. He asked if I minded if he asked a me a few questions for a story he was working on for the Chronicle. Disappointed but still hopeful, I agreed. He asked for my reaction to their not being a BART strike. We chatted for few minutes about various aspects of the non-strike while he busily scribbled notes in his cute little spiral notebook. Then it was time for me to leave. I did so, reluctantly.

posted by Drew @ 10:52 PM | link to this post

News Reports

I walked into the little coffee shop near the admin office and Wendy asked if that was me she saw on the news. I told her that I suspected so. I had been interviewed by KRON while I was at the Barbara Lee rally on Sunday. I was kind of hoping they wouldn't show the clip of me. The reporter asked me why I was there. I responded that I was there to express my appreciation for Barbara Lee and her vote. The reporter also asked me what else (other than racing off to kill people along with the Brits) could we have done. I fumbled this question. I said it was a very complicated question and then rambled about doing more work to build a broader coalition of folks to respond to the incidents without resorting to violence.

I've actually thought a good bit about this question. I just for whatever reason wasn't thinking while the camera was sitting a couple of feet away. My real response is, in fact, complex. First, I question why the question is presented as though our default response has to be to kill. I think the answer lies in the amount of investment we make in preparing to kill (use military force). I wonder what options we would have if we spent billions preparing ourselves for peace. Imagine if we invested billions of dollars in creating vehicles for resolving disputes and responding to acts of aggression in ways that don't perpetuate violence. I look at what folks have done with very little financial resource and practically no official support and I believe that much could be accomplished if we just directed some small portion of our resources toward peaceful coexistence.

But what about right now? I agree with what I've heard from several leaders. We could have started with listening and engaging in processes that would lead to understanding. (I recognize that many oppose any action that appears to be giving in to the aims of terrorism, but it is precisely this attitude that sustains up our culture of force and violence.) I've got more to say, but need to get headed toward work.

A link to explore.

posted by Drew @ 9:53 AM | link to this post

Job Thoughts

I got annoyed with my work yesterday. As I sorted through things, I realized that I have once again strayed from goals I'd set for myself. I'm back in the grind of commuting over to the city daily or almost daily and feeling perpetually behind in work projects. I was very angry with someone at work and so I'm still trying to sort things out in terms of my anger and reality.

About the time I was dealing with things at work, I got a message on my answering machine at home from someone at the City of Berkeley about a temporary job there. I find myself thinking very seriously about the pros and cons of working a couple of blocks from my house. I'm also trying to examine my willingness to bump up my independence by working only on a contract basis. I guess the best I can do at the moment is not to make any rash decisions in my current state of mind and mull through the options.

posted by Drew @ 9:47 AM | link to this post

Monday, October 22, 2001

Coverage

NY Times
SF Gate/Chronicle

posted by Drew @ 9:35 AM | link to this post

Sunday, October 21, 2001

Quote of the Moment

"To educate people for peace, we can use words or we can speak with our lives. If we are not peaceful, if we are not feeling well in our skin, we cannot demonstrate real peace, and we cannot raise our children well either. To take good care of our children means to take good care of ourselves, to be aware of our situation. Please sit down with your child and, together, contemplate the little flowers that grow among the grasses. Breathing in and out, smiling together - that is real peace education. When we can learn to appreciate these small, beautiful things, we will not have to search for anything else. We can be peace ourselves, and we can make peace with our friends and even with our so-called enemies."
- Thich Nhat Hanh

NOTE: When I end my communications with "Be Peace" this is what I am wishing.

posted by Drew @ 11:17 PM | link to this post

Barbara Rocks!

I attended the rally today in support of Barbara Lee and her vote. Frank Ogawa Plaza in downtown Oakland was packed. Thousands turned out to praise Representative Lee. "Barbara Lee for President" and "Thank you!" signs were in great abundance. I was proud to be part of the large, diverse crowd that gathered to support our congresswoman. I was pleased that lots of media turned out to cover the event and see all of us loving and believing in Barbara Lee. I was so happy to see Barbara smiling and strong, obviously feeling moved by the support of so many. I cried when Kelly Campbell, a family member of one of the people killed at the Pentagon, presented Barbara with flowers and spoke of how comforted she was by Barbara's vote and her words on the floor of the house.

I was worried as I watched secret service agents react to people in the crowd and place themselves between Barbara and a woman with a camera who climbed up on stage. It was at that moment that it really dawned on me that she might die for representing me and my views. I still remember the day that Martin Luther King, Jr. was killed, though I didn't fully understand the why of it at the time. I do understand that as Barbara's leadership is recognized, she will be faced with those who would do anything to stop her. I intend to stand with her in any and every way that I can. And I intend to be an active voice for love and peace and compassion and justice, so that she isn't the only one standing out there being targeted.

posted by Drew @ 10:19 PM | link to this post

Saturday, October 20, 2001

What Now?

Bruce Sterling
George Lakoff

posted by Drew @ 6:37 PM | link to this post

Quote of the Moment

We think we need an enemy. Governments work hard to get us to be afraid and to hate so we will rally behind them....

It is not correct to believe that the world's situation is in the hands of the government and that if the President would only have the correct policies, there would be peace. Our daily lives have the most to do with the situation of the world. If we can change our daily lives, we can change our governments and we can change the world. Our presidents and our governments are us. They reflect our lifestyle and way of thinking. The way we hold a cup of tea, pick up a newspaper, and even use toilet paper have to do with peace.

Thich Nhat Hanh

posted by Drew @ 6:07 PM | link to this post

Angry Buddha, Breathing Deeply

I am disappointed and dismayed by the actions of a local person who appears to be seeking to benefit politically from the horrors of September 11. I was hurt a couple of years ago, when she betrayed the support of area Greens in order to further he re-election chances. She ran as a Green, was elected as a Green and then promptly changed her registration to independent as she tried to build a broader base of financial backing. From where I sat, I saw her sell her votes on key issues to interests she believed would facilitate her re-election. Now she is pandering to the worst elements in our country in order to raise money for her campaign for Congress. I can only imagine that she has channeled the spirit of Lee Atwater to guide her in her campaign decision-making and ethics as she cozies up to the likes of Rush Limbaugh, Newt Gingrich, Oliver North and Charles Colson.

"Those who work for peace must have a peaceful heart. When you have a peaceful heart, you are the child of God. But many who work for peace are not at peace. They still have anger and frustration, and their work is not really peaceful....To preserve peace, our hearts must be at peace with the world, with our brothers and our sisters." - TNH

posted by Drew @ 5:49 PM | link to this post

Friday, October 19, 2001

Sweet Conversations

I had a quiet, pleasant dinner and conversation with this guy with whom I used to share nearly every moment of my non-working life.

A while later, I returned a call to this remarkable woman I met a couple of weeks ago and spent some time chatting and getting to know her a little better.

This evening, when I got back to the East Bay from working in The City, I found that a couple of friends had been trying very diligently to round me up for a trip to Jupiter. You know, I'm a very lucky man. I feel like I'm "finding the love" in very real, very tangible ways.

posted by Drew @ 10:54 AM | link to this post

Another Shark?

I awakened from a dream this morning, but with slightly less panic and fear than the last one generated.In fact, I would have to say this dream prompted more of a sense of amusement. Again, all I can remember are the very last moments before I woke up at 5AM. I was watching Gray Davis meeting and chatting with people, then he was looking at me with no one else around. And I could see in his eyes as he struggled to remember me and calculated whether or not I mattered to his political career. My dream ended as I was about to respond....hmmm.

I think it's interesting that I've remembered two dreams this week given that I haven't remembered two dreams in the last two years. Not that there's a relationship between the two things, but I finished reading The Eagle and the Rose yesterday.

posted by Drew @ 10:45 AM | link to this post

Thursday, October 18, 2001

Rula Planet?

It's official! Go see a bunch of "Galaxy Girls" webloggin' together, but don't go for the Ken Ben Ladin/Barbie Taliban dolls.

posted by Drew @ 9:42 AM | link to this post

"We who believe in freedom cannot rest...."

Join Alice Walker, Danny Glover, Rev. Alfred Smith and others from our community on Sunday to show support for Barbara Lee's vote and all that it represented at Frank Ogawa Plaza in downtown Oakland from 2:30-5PM.

posted by Drew @ 9:23 AM | link to this post

Odetta

I just got in from seeing and hearing Odetta with Stacey, my music buddy extraordinaire. It was a very beautiful evening! I find such peace and strength in the wisdom of her words and emotions as she expressed herself tonight.

Her show was beautifully opened this evening by Street Sounds, an a cappella group from Oakland. I've got tremendous appreciation for groups like these guys who use their voices so beautifully. At times, I could swear I heard instruments playing. (They did use some handheld percussion and rhythm instruments.) Listening to them last night has me breaking out the Sweet Honey in the Rock today.

posted by Drew @ 2:10 AM | link to this post

"Gandhi Drew?"
Operation Infinite Love/Enduring Peace: The Anti-Terror Campaign

During the last couple of days I have begun executing my anti-terror campaign. No, I'm not dropping Big Macs on people from high altitudes. But, I have been making extra effort to "show my love" to people in my life. I'm working on a plan to extend my reach. It's kind of fun. And to be honest, nothing distracts people from fears of Anthrax and airplanes like clearly and gently expressed love.

I've been horribly embarrassed at all the praise and flattering remarks I've been receiving. I literally almost hung up on two different people today as they were attempting to heap kind words on me and I couldn't bear it.

posted by Drew @ 2:01 AM | link to this post

Wednesday, October 17, 2001

Sleeping with Sharks

I've been waking up at around 3:30AM for the last three days. Yesterday and Monday I couldn't get back to sleep. This morning I managed to doze off again. I don't know what it is that's been waking me up at the same time for three days in a row. This morning, I think it was a little dream I had....I was standing about chest deep in calm, warm ocean water. It must have been somewhere along the coast of South Florida, probably along the gulf coast side. As I stood there enjoying the water and sun, I looked over and saw a huge shark, fully submerged and swimming towards me. In a flash my mind raced through an analysis that "knew" that I was going to be attacked, knew that I had better not move suddenly or do anything to the draw attention of the shark and looked around and found no sign of anyone or anything to assist me. I woke up as I was leaping out of bed. As I've thought back on this today and talked about it some, I've thought of the shark as my Osama Shark (after listening to KQED) and then my Bush/Rumsfeld/Wolfowitz Shark (after listening to KPFA). I think my trouble sleeping is linked with my worrying a about the the world.

Last night as I walked home I chuckled and then worried at the new Public Safety Building all wrapped in yellow police tape. There was (is) a line of barricades near the walls and windows of the police department with yellow police line tape strung through them, then in the curb (parking) lane there are barricades to keep anyone from parking next to the building. I walked by thinking that I had probably missed some new round of actions taken by friends of my KQED Shark. As I got home I remembered that the City Council was going to be voting on a resolution calling on the US to stop bombing Afghanistan, and I figured that the barricades were probably there in response to the undoubtedly numerous threats the city had received during the day from "good patriotic 'mericans." I thought to myself that I felt a much greater threat to my well being from those folks than I do from any "terrorist."

Meanwhile, it appears 1/3 of my KPFA Shark has scheduled a pep rally at Travis Air Force Base on his way to China.

posted by Drew @ 6:31 PM | link to this post

Sunday, October 14, 2001

Quote of the Moment

I won't know what it is until I do it.

Oaktown Blogger aka Choire's bloggin' momma

posted by Drew @ 3:54 PM | link to this post

Music Mania

In the last couple of days I've purchased tickets to see/hear:

Odetta on Wednesday October 17 in Berkeley
Ryan Adams on Wednesday November 14th @ the Fillmore
John Wesley Harding on Monday December 10 @ The Freight & Salvage

JWH has a couple of free mp3s available for download.

posted by Drew @ 3:36 PM | link to this post

Psychic Friend?

I stopped off at Philo and Choire's today and read this, which is precisely what I was going to write about when I went by East/West to cut and paste links for this post. I like it when there's a certain amount of synchronicity going on in my life. Philo's launching a couple of new sites. One of them is:

Philo's New Site of the Moment

Okay, on with my story.

"I'm not into that crystal sucking stuff"

I've been fortunate in the last few months to cross paths with Philo/Rula Planet/Psychic Friend. I've enjoyed his (and Choire's) writings on East/West and the times we've interacted directly via e-mail, instant messaging and in person. He has been most generous to me in his speech and action. I was also gifted with an opportunity to encounter Rula Planet a few months back. I've had wonderful opportunities to meet and appreciate at least two facets of Philo, cute, queerboy blogger and show queen. Both aspects are well within my zone of comfort. I have looked around curiously at this psychic friend dimension of Philo with an attitude which is probably best captured by the quote above uttered by one of my friends. I approach the idea of psychic phenomena with much the same agnosticism that I do religion. I'm not from Missouri, but I believe that seeing is believing - show me. Anyway, having met and appreciated Philo has me a little more opened up to seeing, experiencing and otherwise observing this phenomenon.

A couple of weeks ago, I showed up at a non-profit in San Francisco to meet with them about their computer networking desires. I was a few minutes early and gently met a woman there who tried to help me settle in comfortably. She had a gently engaging positive energy or presence about her. I was delighted by her glowing recognition of my name. I thought to myself that this is someone that I'd like to get to know. I reoriented myself to my task at hand and focused on re-reading some materials I needed to remember for the meeting I was about to participate in. At some point in the afternoon, her name was made known to me and I realized that she was someone I'd heard a little about from my friend who worked for the agency I was visiting. I remembered her being described to me in loving, kind, compassionate terms as someone "into intuitive healing." Later, as I do with these things, I began making inquiries (Though, I haven't googled her, yet.) and appreciating the gentle sensitivity and compassionate awareness/mindfulness that seem to imbue her life.

So, the question arose for me of whether I should be dismissive of this "crystal sucking stuff" and her as not me or relax and look and learn. I thought of Philo and my appreciation for him and it seemed clear that I should pay attention and not distance or disengage. But, how do I pay attention? Then my sister and I spoke on the phone yesterday.

I didn't bring up my interest in the woman, who for now shall remain unnamed, as we talked about things that have been going in our lives. My sister spoke with me with considerable animation about a book she had read recently, The Eagle and The Rose by Rosemary Altea. I felt my skepticism kick in as I listened to my sister talk about the positive impact reading the book had had on her. We talked on about a lot of things before she raced off to take my niece to cheerleading. After walking by the Indigenous Peoples Day celebration, I stopped in at the library and looked up The Eagle and The Rose in the online catalogue and checked it out and started reading it. Don't get me wrong. I've had no great movement of my mind, just perhaps a gentle opening of my heart to listen lovingly and observe and appreciate, and hopefully more completely engage the world around me.

I am appreciative of Philo and my sister for sharing their lives with me and helping me to be more nearly the person that I want to be.

posted by Drew @ 1:54 PM | link to this post

Friday, October 12, 2001

Glow in the Dark Bunny?

Transgenic "artist" Eduardo Kac wanted to exhibit a glow-in-the-dark dog, but since that technology was not yet possible, he commissioned scientist Louis-Marie Hodebine and others at the National Institute of Agronomic Research in France to create a fluorescent green bunny, named Alba.

Maybe it's just the perverse side of me that worked with convicted sex offenders for five years, but I can't for the life of me figure out any good reason someone would want a glow-in-the-dark dog.

posted by Drew @ 7:29 PM | link to this post

Tuesday, October 09, 2001

Does It Really Matter?

I read this morning in the New York Times that Rush Limbaugh has suffered an almost total loss of hearing over the last four months or so. Somehow, I've never been struck by his demonstrated capacity for listening. I really don't wish him any ill will. I wonder if this is a judgment from God. Perhaps he should consult with a couple of other great non-listeners, Falwell and Robertson.

"I cannot communicate with people," he said. "I can occasionally talk to people in person one on one. But I cannot hear radio. I cannot hear television. I cannot hear music."

posted by Drew @ 9:26 AM | link to this post

Monday, October 08, 2001

Sonoma Moments

I look back this morning and feel even greater appreciation for the joyful weekend I spent in Sonoma celebrating the wedding of two (3) very wonderful friends. It's been a while since I've attended a wedding. Somewhere in my twisted experience has been the intermingling of emotions for weddings and funerals. I think it's because in the last 15 years or so, I've come together with friends and family most frequently for funerals. And even though there's an element of appreciation for the deceased and the folks who come together to pay respects, funerals aren't really a celebration, no matter what we may tell ourselves. This weekend on the other hand was a pure celebration of love. It brought me comfort with the world, with my friends, with my friends' friends and family, and with the interconnectedness of us all. I am grateful.

An Anagramatic Tribute (sort of) to the Bride

One charismatic kidney
I'm keyed Anachronistic
Aerodynamic inset hick
Idiosyncratic knee ham
Hey kid, I'm transoceanic
I charismatic neon dyke
Eye it, dick Anachronism
In one charismatic dyke
I track Indochinese Amy
I’m any considerate hick
I Corinthians acme dyke
Incriminate chaos dyke
Incriminate shaky coed
Do incriminate each sky
Eery dick’s machination
Act! Rim Indochinese yak
Yeah! Kid is necromantic
a ad-interim soy chicken
No ad-interim easy chick
I can administer hockey
Hey, an’ I administer cock
Ascendancy heir? I'm it! Ok?
Sheik, aid my concertina
I am his concertina dyke

The anagrams above were generated using Martin's Java Applet Anagram Generator.

posted by Drew @ 9:59 AM | link to this post

Thursday, October 04, 2001

One More Scary Thought

I'm global! Here's where visitors to my site came from in September:

1. com (Commercial) 1,219----------53.2%
2. net (Network) 570----------24.9%
3. unresolved 287----------12.5%
4. edu (Educational) 60---------- 2.6%
5. ca (Canada) 20----------0.9%
6. gov (USA Government) 20----------0.9%
7. us (United States) 14----------0.6%
8. uk (United Kingdom) 10----------0.4%
9. tw (Taiwan) 9---------- 0.4%
10. au (Australia) 7----------0.3%
11. sa (Saudi Arabia) 6----------0.3%
12. fr (France) 6----------0.3%
13. mil (USA Military) 6----------0.3%
14. ae (United Arab Emirates) 5----------0.2%
15. it (Italy) 5----------0.2%
16. de (Germany) 4----------0.2%
17. za (South Africa) 3----------0.1%
18. br (Brazil) 3----------0.1%
19. org (Non-Profit Organizations) 3----------0.1%
20. at (Austria) 3----------0.1%
21. jp (Japan) 2----------0.1%
22. il (Israel) 2----------0.1%
23. th (Thailand) 2----------0.1%
24. mx (Mexico) 2----------0.1%
25. es (Spain) 2----------0.1%
26. tr (Turkey) 2----------0.1%
27. in (India) 2----------0.1%
28. pt (Portugal) 2----------0.1%
29. ie (Ireland) 2----------0.1%
30. arpa (Old style Arpanet) 2----------0.1%
31. ch (Switzerland) 2----------0.1%
32. cl (Chile) 1----------0%
33. ir (Iran) 1----------0%
34. na (Namibia) 1----------0%
35. sg (Singapore) 1----------0%
36. se (Sweden) 1----------0%
37. be (Belgium) 1----------0%
38. dk (Denmark) 1----------0%
39. int (International) 1----------0%
40. nl (Netherlands) 1----------0%

posted by Drew @ 4:00 PM | link to this post

Huhhhh?

I just looked at this report available through my webhosting. I think it's a report of search terms (keywords) that returned my site. I'm not sure from where or how. I guess a lot of folks are disappointed by my site. It frightens me a little that 5, 36, 44, 47....Okay, I can't list all the ones that disturb me. I suppose I've just compounded the "problem" by posting this list. But honestly, I've never writtten about #5. I swear!

Oh wait, maybe this is a list of terms I've searched! I'm just kidding, please!

Here's the real explanation of what the report is:

Top Keywords This report shows the actual keywords or phrases visitors typed into search engines, such as Yahoo!, AltaVista, HotBot, Northernlight, or Lycos.

1. sophie aldrich
2. more money rapers
3. ampu fetish
4. drew naked
5. womenlovephotofuckdogegypt
6. shelby lynne
7. 36dd 24 36 san jose
8. governor and double wide
9. foreskin diary
10. gay boys masturbation experiences stories
11. suffering is not enough
12. angela davis prison industrial complex
13. baby sitter fantasy
14. buddhism without beliefs
15. ambrosia parsley
16. ambrosia parsley
17. stephen batchelor meditation
18. large breasted hh
19. nakedmotherswithboys
20. ear wax removal
21. weblog sleeping nude
22. wonderful100freepicturemasturbation
23. gay male escorts nashville
24. anal penetration
25. clitoris carbolic acid
26. the naked guy berkeley pictures
27. cache:vx0pfdw6dd0:www.drewking.com/2001_07_01_blogarch.html angry inch size matt
28. little boy sex
29. deep dickollective
30. free erotic stories of older women having sex with young boys
31. keystrokes per minute average
32. sf gate morning fix
33. social service tipping
34. teeth grinding and paxil
35. anderson valley news
36. teen pussy
37. photos of erected clitoris
38. sidewalk drawing
39. pussy pix
40. vote nude judge
41. cache:vx0pfdw6dd0:www.drewking.com/2001_07_01_blogarch.html turning to stone boy
42. buddhism without beliefs stephen batchelor
43. suzanne somers playboy
44. argyll fellatio photo
45. erotic stories shared free force
46. teeth grinding seratonin
47. archives of sex stories of old men who fuck children
48. ritual naked pic
49. killin kind
50. clamor magazine
51. kingdrewsdiary
52. playboy photos suzanne somers
53. google young gay stories
54. executed clitoris pic
55. ethicallyproducedclothing
56. giuliani gay koeppel
57. larry hanh fragrance
58. cachehttpwwwdrewkingcombloggerhtml
59. shelby lynne naked
60. big sur abundance gathering
61. two girls got struck by lightning on the pensacola beach
62. genetically modified foodsorganisms
63. stephen batchelor
64. cache:vx0pfdw6dd0:www.drewking.com/2001_07_01_blogarch.html ampu sex
65. drewking.com
66. sex little boy
67. capitalism kills
68. sf morning fix
69. erotic stories via email
70. sfgate fix
71. jesus losing my religion
72. bruxism and toothache
73. www.suzanne somers photos
74. www.suzanne somers playboy
75. chastity stories bay sitter

posted by Drew @ 3:38 PM | link to this post

Meeting the Folks

I met my friend Cindy's parents Tuesday over breakfast at La Note. It's been a bit of joke or something that I haven't met them over the last few years. Somehow their visits have always conflicted with other things that were going on. Anyway, they're in the area 'cause Cindy and Salvador are getting married tomorrow. I enjoyed meeting them. They are both very distinct in their presence and engaging in their manner. Of course, they were gonna be good folks! They raised Saint Cindy!

posted by Drew @ 11:20 AM | link to this post

busy buddha

It's been almost a week since my last posting! I think I've been working a little too much. My mind has also been in this place of not wanting to be sitting down in front of my computer when I get home. I'm thinking I'm gonna work from home today, so I'll be clearing off the cluttered desktop around my computer and trying to re-engage the space here.

I had a good morning of sitting and I feel like I'm on the verge of finding the ground again in my life. I just opened my PacBell bill and discovered that I paid it three times last month. And since the last bill was for two months or something, I probably won't be paying them anymore money this year. Not my most mindful performance in bill paying!

posted by Drew @ 11:14 AM | link to this post