Saturday, October 03, 2009

Mortal Thoughts

I'm not sure if it's because a friend's sister is likely dying this weekend (perhaps already dead) or just my own doings, but my not busy moments have been filled with thoughts of how someday I'll be dead. Actually, my thoughts have been more general than that. It's probably more accurate to say that I've been thinking of how we will all be dead. And I've been wondering what's the purpose of our living or ever having lived. The more Darwinian side of me quickly answers that our sole purpose is to reproduce and anything else, like poisoning the environment or killing thousands of people in Iraq or anywhere else, doesn't really matter. But I suppose that reproducing does not really matter either. Each of us will be dead and ultimately so will our planet and everything else that we know or think we know or will ever know or ever think we know.

In my better moments I jump away from these stomach sickening feelings to, at least internally, articulated resolve to live in a manner that embraces the moment that we are each given. Despite my best buddhisty aspirations and respirations, my better moments are somewhat short lived lately.

You know the best part of it is that it doesn't really matter, at least not tonight.

posted by Drew @ 9:39 PM | link to this post