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06/09/2001 Entry: "Dateless No More"

I had two dates during the last week with women. I met one woman through a kind of fix up thing by a friend and I met the other through online interactions. Both were within about 4 years of my age.

The First First Date
This date presented itself rather suddenly at the urging/suggestion of a friend. I figured it couldn't hurt. Boy, was I wrong!

Okay maybe it wasn't the most painful thing I've experienced, but it was painfully clear that this was not the person for me within the first 2.6 seconds of our face-to-face meeting. I have to confess, I was coaxed into this by the fact of her age being near mine and the fact of her being really, really cute. I saw her picture before we met. (I really should have been more astute to the now rather obvious implications of the BMW in the picture with her. I guess I missed it somewhere in the glow of her beautiful smile. I'm such a sucker for pretty face.) In summary, it was really clear that she wasn't interested in my values, though she seemed interested in me. The thought crossed my mind that I should just kiss her (She has those kissable lips!) and that would slow down the rate at which she was saying things that were making it clear that we had virtually nothing in common. This thought was immediately interrupted by the thought that this was something I'd probably seen Clark Gable do. I usually look to Clark Gable for examples of how not to treat women. So, I chatted and smiled and looked for a graceful way out.

As things wound down, I thought about how to be honest and not promise to call when I wasn't going to or anything else. She moved closer in what seemed to be a prelude to a kiss. I interrupted and tried to gently lay out my perception of our future potential. She got mad! She didn't hit me, but I thought she might for a minute or two. Thankfully it ended. I think she finally heard me and didn't feel quite so hurt. I was a little angry and frustrated by her reaction.

The Second First Date(?)
Friday evening I met her at the Lafayette BART Station. We hadn't met before, but she'd e-mailed me her picture and she's seen mine on my website. We recognized each other when she drove up. I got in. We drove to Tilden Park and talked along the way. We walked to Jewell Lake and talked and noticed things. We wandered around The Little Farm and then drove aorund the park some more and I showed her different trail heads. (She likes to go hiking, but hadn't ever been to Tilden.) We drove back in to Berkeley and ate dinner downtown and talked.

I wasn't sure if this was really a date or just two humans getting to know each other a little more than e-mails and phone conversations allow.